Man I really enjoyed this video. Especially after a few nights in hotels working with BoE Private Clients to raise the bar in awareness for Pure Planet Racing with some of their top clients in Johannesburg and Durban. I slept very well the first night and the body felt great on a long run the next morning. So much so that I felt I could and should get out for a second run yesterday afternoon. The opportunity to run 2 cities in 1 day was just too much fun for my geeky sports orientated brain to avoid.

Last night, however, I slept particularly badly. A combination of having a few glasses of particularly good Sauvignon Blanc and a 4:15am wake up call had me tossing and turning. Because of the way I feel today, there is no way I could go out and train. I have to skip a session I had planned this afternoon because it would be a waste and my weekend would go out the window. I would be compromising a week of good training rather than getting in a session where I would be faffing and just getting it done.

When in doubt, leave it out, as Andrew Maclean likes to say.

I have made an enquiry with Zeo to see if their sleep coach device is available here in South Africa.

But back to “feel”. I am a numbers junkie at the best of times and at other times, I really don’t want to see the numbers at all. Some days I will analyze the entire ride on the Powertap vs Heart Rate vs Altitude gains, etc. Other days, I leave the Garmin at home for a forest run where the point really is to get purposefully lost and lie under a tree for a while, mid run.

For me, even when riding with the Garmin, I am always trying to be aware of what certain intensities feel like, what 350watts on a 10minute climb feels like in the legs, the lungs, in the mind especially, the emotions that happen around minute 4 when it seems like it will never end. I believe “feel” is one of the major things lost on the amateur guys. They are so obsessed with the numbers that they forget what the number/goal/interval/intensity feels like. When their devices fail (and they do fail from time to time) they are left in the dark and cannot get the combination right and bomb out badly.

As the weekend is approaching, I would like to urge you to give “feel” a go this weekend. Tape up a part of your device and go on feel, referencing it only once or twice in your workout. Work with the body, talk to it (ok, yes, I am mad) and listen to what it’s telling you about how it feels when you push it in a certain way.

Right now though, I am going to feel my way through a cup of coffee and the war on admin continues…

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Yes, another motivational video. I love them. They make me want to go out and train. In truth, I write because I want it to be my fault.

I want it to be my fault that you are off your seat and outside with the fresh air in your hair.

I want it to be my fault that you took the giant leap of faith to enter your first race, your first test, your biggest challenge to date.

I want it to be my fault that you grimaced through the plateau and blew your mind and body out of the stratosphere and learnt to truly believe you can achieve anything.

I want it to be my fault that you reconsidered your life, that you reconsidered what is possible and made the leap into the unknown only to come out stronger and a bigger asset to everyone around you.

After all, once all that has happened, you`ll realise it has nothing to do with me, that it was not my fault in any particular way. That really, all I may have done is given the spark, but that really, it was all your fault.

ALL

YOUR

FAULT.

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I have loads of questions at the moment, many pertaining to society and why we do the things we do, what sense most of them make and truly, the real meaning of why we are here. It’s a great space to be in, contrary to what many would think. I will put it out there that its due to the training and work stresses I am under at the moment, the fatigue that comes with it and the absolute pure humanness of myself. I am imperfect in every perfect way. That is the way I like to see it. I strive for a balanced life, at times this means 7 hour bike rides and at other times it means I wanted to come home at 10pm but the wine and company were so good that I snuck in after midnight with a smile on my dial and a slight added tiredness in the morning. This is how I choose it.

It’s been a great week for great questions.

What am I doing long term with my life?

How am I going to create a legacy for my kids to aspire to?

How on earth am I going to run the next 20min at VO2 Threshold when I am bobbing and weaving across the road already like a ragdoll in a bullmastiffs mouth?

Who has the coffee?

What is up with the dating game?

Why, if in the first video, are all the guys Lance dropped, either back from a doping suspension or retired because of doping? With all the current accusations there are lots of questions regarding sport and the legitimacy of certain performances in certain sports. It does sadden me a little and I hope that it amounts to nothing so that my full faith can be restored into what is a special sport to me.

How am I going to execute certain scenarios in Kona?

When am I going to see my entire family together again?

Questions are important. I would hate to think I would ever know everything, this I have said before and I will always stand by it. Without asking questions we can’t get the freedom of the answer. Take a step back though and you have to be prepared to ask the question. Another step back and you have to be prepared for the right answer, which isnt the answer you might want, or the answer which leaves you with a improved self image. Courage is a key part in asking questions. Most people will only ask questions they know the answers to or the questions with safe answers.

Even then its not always that clear. Take a guy like Allen Lim, who stood by Floyd Landis, based on the numbers he put out on the day he essentially won the Tour de France. According to the facts, the numbers and the data, it was not a superhuman ride. The facts made perfect sense. Core temperature control, watts control and there you go. Simple, not easy, right? Not so in the current debacle with Landis. Allen Lim is one of the most obsessive, smart, calculating people on the planet and even he cannot answer all the questions, like:

Why come out now Floyd?

If the numbers were all normal, why risk everything if Floyd knew, still took the chance that he might get caught?

What am I doing in this sport if no matter how much sense it makes, some doos is still going to cheat?

I cannot imagine all the questions a guy like him asks himself all the time. They have to think of everything, as pioneers to a cleaner sport, three times as much as the guys who are just gaaning aan like there was no repercussion.

So whilst the never ending stream of questions resounds so loudly in my head, there is hope for me this extended weekend in the form of a mini-camp. 3 days of what it seems is going to be bad weather, long miles and lots of wet cycling gear. When out there, many questions are asked as well, especially on the harder weather days:

What the hell are you doing?

Where is the coffee?

What the hell are you doing?

Where is the food?

Ok, come to think of it, its all about coffee, food and why I am out there pushing the limits. Maybe that is exactly why I am out there?

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“You’re addicted!” The only way you’ve avoided hearing that phrase is by either not telling people you train most days of the week or by not actually training most days of the week. Such sins of omission are entirely understandable. Keeping the peace, or a low profile can be difficult enough when you’ve got a tan like a panda bear and legs as hairless as Michael Jordan’s head. The full story has been known to cause non-athletes to think your last known address was Area 51. Wait till you do an Ironman, then when you explain to people WHAT it is, you will learn the true meaning of blank expression.

But addicted? It’s not like any of us would ever say, “I can stop this any time.” We don’t pretend our lives could go on without sport and remain fulfilled, enjoyable. And shouldn’t that be the definition of addicted? Shouldn’t a true addiction be something we are honest about, the thing without which our lives would lose some luster? (more…)

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